Don’t waste time on what’s not important. Don’t get sucked into the drama. Get on with it: don’t dwell on the past. Be a big person; be generous of spirit; be the person you’d admire. Allegra Huston
Drama! Such an uninviting and irritating way to live. And yet we often find ourselves caught up in drama for a significant portion of our lives. It seems we are forced into it everywhere we turn: work, home, and significant as well as insignificant relationships easily provide grist for ongoing conflict.
And yet, as much as we hate it, we find ourselves cursed with a disturbing tendency to continue to play party to it. Institutions are often drama instigators. Of late I have dealt with airlines, TV providers, post office, government agencies, and insurance, just to name a few.
The Drama of Relationships
But the most overwhelming drama in our lives is undoubtedly relationships… and the closer the relationship the heavier the drama, especially family. Ugh. 40 years ago when my grandmother died her nine daughters all gathered in her tiny little trailer, all fighting over who gets what of her meek possessions. The drama of this event began a rift in the family that lasted for months—fortunately it wasn’t longer.
No doubt you are currently experiencing some form of uncomfortable dram in your life, If not, don’t worry, it’s only a matter of time. Haha.
So What Can You Do About It?
This morning I engaged in a most enlightening conversation with a friend whose career puts him in the midst of most harmful drama with coworkers, bosses, and clients. He has put up with it for more than half a decade. But of late he has decided to distance himself from the drama.” He chooses healthy relationships over toxic ones; he chooses not to allow himself to enter into the fray. He ignores the drama and chooses to abandon involvement in it.
That’s when it occurred to me, “You have a choice in the drama of your life: play or don’t play.”
I have a few hints of how to distance you from drama:
- Make a conscious choice “not to get involved.”
- Make a statement of your position and seek beneficial reconciliation.
- Abandon toxic and drama filled relationships and people.
- Honor your own time. Drama is a waste of time. Do something productive or fun.
Your time is too precious to waste it on unreasonable people or situations. And yes, there is of course no way to avoid all drama. But you can most certainly avoid a large portion of it.
If Drama is a Choice
I Choose “No”
Photo courtesy of ueuaphoto at istockphoto
Thank you Charlie!
We are all subject to drama from time to time.
It seems inevitable! However, it is up to us to decide when we choose to be true to ourselves and literally walk away or distance ourselves. The key is to do it without feeling the guilt, especially when it’s family.
I’m work environments to be able to remain autonomous
And still participate as part of the team –
If often “not allowed”. Again, have the confidence and courage no to fit in is freeing-yet, not for everyone.
Hitting reset and refocusing on positive attributes
Of ourselves and others can help this drama addiction.
What we speak of, think of and dwell on can make us feel bad or really great! The next time you are feeling nit so good, try bringing a happy creative thought, project or activity into your mind. Then just go do it! One positive action can help clear the head and the heart. A little fresh air goes a long way! ? When we practice self compassion we are able to give it to others, as well.
Very helpful suggestions Suzanne. Thank you.